NBA's DeAndre Jordan -- Message to 8th Grade Kanye ... Screw Basketball!!

EXCLUSIVE

With Kanye West still complaining about not making his 8th grade basketball team , NBA superstar DeAndre Jordan says he wishes he could've delivered a message to 13-year-old Yeezus -- "F**k basketball"

The L.A. Clippers star clearly subscribes to the theory that all things happen for a reason -- and while he knows it must've been frustrating for 'Ye at the time, he would've told middle school Yeezy to let it go ... 'cause you're gonna be RICH AS HELL!!!

Fun Fact -- Jordan says he's not just a huge Kanye fan but also relates to the guy -- "I feel like I'm the 6'11" Yeezus ... So it's good!"

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Stars Gettin' Grizzly -- Guess Who!

Making it big in Hollywood can be a hairy experience ... but these celebs seem to have it under control -- Can you guess which stars are the proud owners of these follicle forests?

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'American Horror Story' Star Ben Woolf -- In Stable Condition ... But Not Out of the Woods

EXCLUSIVE

"American Horror Story: Freak Show" star Ben Woolf is no longer in critical condition ... but doctors say he still has a tough road ahead.

Sources close to the actor tell us Ben has yet to wake up ... and is being kept sedated while under constant doctor supervision -- but the upgrade to his condition is good news.

TMZ broke the story ... Woolf was hospitalized after he was struck in the head by a moving car.

Sources tell us his family has been by his bedside the entire time ... and "AHS" creator Ryan Murphy -- as well as other cast and crew from the show -- have sent flowers to his room.

Woolf's rep Zack Teperman tells us, "Ben's family thanks everyone for their love, support and well wishes."

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Stars and Scars -- You Be the Judge

You Be the Judge

17 minutes ago BY TMZ STAFF

The Amber/Kim/Kanye feud is fabulously fabulous. Meanwhile, the whole Tyga thing is gettin' real creepy fast. So we gotta ask ...

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J.K. Simmons -- I Crack The Whip ... But Don't Try It At Home

I Crack The Whip ...

But Don't Try It At Home

EXCLUSIVE

J.K. Simmons isn't someone with whom you want to play musical chairs ... the Oscar nominated "Whiplash" star says there's only one situation where throwing furniture at people works.

Simmons is cleaning up this awards season for his role as the ball-busting Terence Fletcher in the film ... but our photog found out, he doesn't agree with his character's teaching methods.

It doesn't sound like it was inspired by any teachers he had growing up, but he thinks Fletcher's "methods" only fly in one place.

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Danica Patrick -- I'm Not Loose! (TMZ TV)

TMZ TV

Danica Patrick was looking to brawl with fellow NASCAR driver Denny Hamlin after they wrecked at Daytona -- grabbing him and yelling, "Don't be up my ass!"

Taken out of context ... this could be the sexiest fight ever -- but who would do that?

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Amber Rose Attacks Kim Kardashian ... What a Nut!!!

Breaking Nudes

Amber Rose just answered Kayne West by zeroing in on the climactic scene in Kim Kardashian 's sex tape, saying "Wait 30 Showers? But Kim let RayJ nut on her .... Never Mind."

In case you're not up to date ... Kanye went on "The Breakfast Club" and said it was hard for him to move on to Kim after being with Amber, saying, "I had to take 30 showers before I got with Kim."

Amber is not backing down. She's already called Kim a whore and Kanye is doing Kim's bidding.

The only true surprising thing ... how come Ray J hasn't inserted himself?

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J.J. Abrams -- New Lightsaber Gets Seal of Approval ... From Major Celebrity Nerd

New Lightsaber Got Approval

From Major Celebrity Nerd

EXCLUSIVE

A short time ago in cyberspace not so far away ... nerds were up in arms over the new lightsaber seen briefly in the "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" trailer -- but the movie's director says he's got saber support from Hollywood's biggest nerd.

J.J. Abrams was on his way out of Bad Robot's studio ... when he told our photog he's not surprised at the cross-saber backlash -- but he also knew lots of fans would think it's cool.

In case you don't know, the hubbub is over the practicality of the design -- it seems like the sword could easily cut anyone using the Jedi tool.

But Abrams says one celeb nerd with major pull already gave him two wookie thumbs up.

Hint: he's a big "Lord of the Rings" fan.

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TMZ Live: War at Pam Anderson's: What Did She Do to the Family Dog?

War at Pam Anderson's:

What Did She Do to the Family Dog?

46 minutes ago BY TMZ STAFF

ON TODAY'S SHOW

• Kanye West Trashes Amber Rose!


• Bruce Jenner's Crash Victim Has a Famous Past


• Nickelback's Lead Singer Criticizes Justin Bieber


• An 'American Horror Story' Star Injured in a Freak Accident

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Porn Star Tory Lane Goes Nuts on Delta ... Arrested for Assaulting Cop

Exclusive Details

A top porn star went nuts on a Delta flight and ended up in jail, after attacking the flight crew and a cop.

Tory Lane -- who ironically starred in an XXX flick called "When Porn Stars Attack" -- was flying from ATL to LAX Wednesday night when she apparently got rip-roaring drunk, argumentative and then physical. She was allegedly screaming and kicking people on the plane, to the point where she had to be physically restrained during the last 45 minutes of the flight.

Once on the ground, cops boarded the plane and she allegedly assaulted a cop. The story was covered Thursday, but we just found out the passenger was a multiple AVN award winner.

Lane never made it to the baggage claim. She went directly to the hospital and then jail, where she was booked for battery on a police officer and drunk in public. She's since been released.

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'American Horror Story' Star Ben Woolf -- Struck By Car Mirror ... Condition Critical

EXCLUSIVE

"American Horror Story: Freak Show" star Ben Woolf is in critical condition after he was struck in the head by a moving car in Hollywood Thursday night ... TMZ has learned.

Law enforcement sources tell us ... the 4'4" actor heavily featured in the current season of the show was struck in the head by the mirror of a passing SUV as he crossed a Hollywood street. He was rushed to a nearby hospital.

Cops say they did not ticket the driver because Ben was jaywalking when he was struck.

As for Ben ... he remains in intensive care.

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Laura Lee in 'The Outlaw Josey Wales': 'Memba Her?!

Sondra Locke is best known for playing Laura Lee -- opposite her live-in boyfriend at the time Clint Eastwood -- in the 1976 western "The Outlaw Josey Wales." Guess what she looks like now!

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Jay Z -- Maybe Baby's All Growed Up ... And Trying to Rap (TMZ TV)

A man claiming to be Jay Z's long lost love child is trying to prove it in court -- but says Jigga won't play ball. Rymir Satterthwaite remains determined, even though the case has already been dismissed once.

Rymir’s hoping the second time's the charm for him -- and if nothing else ... at least check out his rapping. Yes, he raps too. Coincidence?

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Eddie Murphy -- Pulled a David Spade on SNL Alum ... YEARS Before 'Falling Star' Diss

Eddie Murphy threw a David Spade-style shot at a "Saturday Night Live" alum way back in 1981 ... making his decades-long grudge against SNL puzzling.

We found this clip of Murphy on Weekend Update during Season 6 ... talking about his fear the military draft would return -- and then offering up the perfect draft candidate -- Garrett Morris.

Eddie then held up Morris' head shot and added, "I know he's a little over age, but word has it he's got a lot of free time right now."

Interesting ... given Murphy's legendary grudge years later over a "Hollywood Minute" segment featuring David Spade, who quipped, "Look children, a falling star" ... while showing Eddie's pic.

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TMZ Live: "Jay Z is My Father" Claims Wannabe Rapper

Wannabe Rapper Claims:

Jay Z is My Father!

47 minutes ago BY TMZ STAFF

ON TODAY'S SHOW

• Hollywood's Most Glamorous Event is a Filthy, Disgusting Mess!


• Russell Simmons SLAMS Geraldo's Hip Hop Comments


• The Honey Boo Boo Family May Be Back on TV!


• Shocking New Details in the Arrest of Vanilla Ice

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Jay Z Sued -- I'm Your Son, Just Admit It ... Says Wannabe Rapper

breaking news

Jay Z had a love child 21 years ago and is now blocking the guy's efforts to prove he's the son of the rap mogul ... according to legal docs.

The guy's name is Rymir Satterthwaite and he claims his mother hooked up with Jay back in the early '90s -- before he was world famous, and long before Beyonce was in the picture.

Rymir and Lillie Coley -- who calls herself his legal guardian -- say in a civil suit ... Jay Z submitted fraudulent information to the court ... to intentionally torpedo Rymir's paternity claim.

It's unclear what that fraudulent info is -- but there are reports that Jay is refusing to take a paternity test.

Rymir happens to be an aspiring rapper ... who's posted vids of himself rhyming.

The civil lawsuit was handwritten by Coley ... who claims Jay's actions have caused Rymir financial and emotional damage.

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Bobby Brown's Wife -- Praying for Bobbi Kristina ... Beef with Nick Gordon

EXCLUSIVE

Bobby Brown 's wife left Bobbi Kristina and her husband in Atlanta and flew to L.A., where she made 2 things clear ... they still have hope, and they want nothing to do with Nick Gordon .

Alicia Etheredge landed in L.A. Wednesday and told our photog their hope for Bobbi Kristina 's survival is prayer. We asked about the doctors advising Bobby to make a decision on withdrawing life support, but her focus is God.

Alicia -- who is pregnant -- bristled when Nick Gordon's name came up. As we reported, Nick is now going public , trying to put pressure on the Brown family, to let him see Bobbi Kristina, but Alicia's reaction makes it clear ... he's persona non grata.

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Guess Who This Gap-Toothed Girl Turned Into!

Before this smiling little kid was one of Hollywood's hottest models she was just another kid making some serious dough from the tooth fairy. Can you guess who she is?!

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TMZ Live: Afroman: The Vicious Punch Explained...

Afroman:

The Vicious Punch Explained...

2/18/2015 9:45 AM PST BY TMZ STAFF

ON TODAY'S SHOW

• Wiz Khalifa's War with Amber Rose Turns Ugly


• New Crash Video May Seal Bruce Jenner's Fate


• Taylor Swift and Kanye Really are BFFs


• A Huge Star SLAMS 'Fifty Shades of Grey'

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Carl The Janitor in 'The Breakfast Club': 'Memba Him?!

John Kapelos is best known for playing the all knowing janitor Carl -- opposite Paul Gleason as Principal Richard Vernon -- in the 1985 classic comedy "The Breakfast Club." Guess what he looks like now!

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